It is not enough to remove the child's bed on sunny days so that it becomes clean! Make and destroy sandcastles, collect seashells, eat with your fingers ... Emmanuelle Rigon, psychologist, explains how these diverted paths favor the acquisition of cleanliness.
Collect seashells to learn how to hold back
- Around the age of 2, the collector fever often appears! This is your child who amass piles of shells, small pebbles, pieces of wood picked up at random walks. Above all, do not interfere, do not throw anything even if it creates a little mess! Your toddler needs to have his little personal treasure hidden away in a secret place, or rather, to hold back: he experiences retention in a very concrete way. After all, become clean, what is it? Hold her pee or poo to do it in the right place at the right time!
Haro on the pies!
- On the beach, do not be surprised if your little builder spends a long time making sand patches ... then destroying them with furious foot pats, uttering savage yells! Again, do not intervene, do not scold him.
- Around 2 years old, we ask him a lot: to respect interdicts, to learn the rules of life in society and to become clean! He must give up his omnipotence in many areas. This is why he tends to "catch up" elsewhere: by destroying what he has built, he proves that he can control things, have power over them.
- The more freedom you give him to compensate, to let off steam, the easier he will accept to submit to your desire to see him become clean.
- Enjoy the summer to free him from certain obligations. For example, let him walk often naked or just in panties. Feel free to relax the meal, bath and bedtime, although of course it is important to maintain a minimum environment respectful of its pace.
- Why also not give him permission to eat with your fingers? During picnics, it's not very embarrassing! The more he can experience pleasure in very physical and sensory experiences, the fewer constraints he will have, the more he will accept the pot.
- A child who is allowed to live his desires without permanently opposing him has more spontaneous desire to go towards the desire of the parents.
Beware of "scrubbing" too much
- For fear of having sand in your ears, nostrils or buttocks, you are tempted to "scour" your little one with force and vigor after a day at the beach. Beware of excesses! During the training phase of cleanliness, your child is very concerned about his anal orifice. It is therefore better to avoid overly intrusive lines vis-à-vis other body openings. You could create a real blockage or at least a resistance.
Isabelle Gravillon with the collaboration of Emmanuelle Rigon, psychologist, author of Des points to live well with your children from 0 to 7 years old and La Propreté, ed. Bayard.
To read more
> Clean day / night: all you need to know
> When will it be clean?
> 15 tips to learn the pot
> Approach cleanliness without stressing